la casa

So you’re staking out classifieds, stalking sellers, prowling along the corridors, putting on an air of bravado on your very first house viewing. But once you’re there, you realize that the owner has made the first move: the house is spick and span, everything is neat and organized, down to the storeroom; everything about the place is perfect, from the neighbours, to the breeze and the nearby ammenities.

Darn. What’s there to pick on?

Well, when all else fails, ask Mummy! Here are the bits of folk wisdom my mummy dispensed:

1. Direction
   Ideally, the house should face the south. If there’s not possible, north facing is fine too. Permutations of South/North with other directions are passable but you should never never never buy East and West facing flats. Bring your own compass!
2. Neighbours
   The Australian soap doesn’t have a mega following in Singapore, but you sure don’t want any drama with your neighbours. If you’re sensitive to dust and noise, avoid the incessant incense burners. Also, if it is within your capacity to find out, the person living below you shouldn’t be an AC buff. His/Her compressor will generate a lot of heat and inevitably causes your need to blast the AC too.
3. Low levels
   Not only noisy, the main bane of low levels are the influx of rats and other creepy crawlies whenever the rubbish chute fills up or isn’t cleared during the public holidays for example.
4. Transport
   To safeguard the value of your house, convenience is a must. If it requires one bus ride, even a few stops, to the interchange, your rental/resale value will decrease as the flat becomes older.
5. Leakage
   Watch out for leakage of ceilings and pipes. It’s not a good thought to have to collect golden showers from the guy upstairs. HDB doesn’t help very much when it comes to such matters. Ask me, we’ve made many complaints.
6. Price comparison
   Lastly, to compare the prices of units of different size, use this formula: Area/Cost.
7. Prayer
   House hunting requires good timing, good agents, luck and call for good judgement under pressuring circumstances. Divine intervention helps.

Pearls of wisdom dispensed, ironically before the swine. Let’s hope self-awareness remedies that! Wish us hunting luck!